Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
