...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Of course I have a pirate flag
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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