soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
