Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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