Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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