in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
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