like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
