Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
