Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize