I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
