He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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