everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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