He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Boobs are out for the taking
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
