we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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