More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize