You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
