a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Every concussion has its silver lining
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
