I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Randomize
