Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I've blown a few things in my day
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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