I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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