Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
