Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I just gargled with NyQuil
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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