Yo dont text me then not text me
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
