Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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