trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Terrible idea I love it
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
