hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
