you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
