if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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