Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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