it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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