If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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