I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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