I don't think brook has ever known best
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
