so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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