she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
