Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
