look no pants
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
