he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
