dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
pray to the hookup gods
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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