we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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