i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
