i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
