What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
What did we do last night that was yellow?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
