I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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