Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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