dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
