hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
