It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
