Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
