you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Randomize
